A Step-by-Step Guide to Giving a Baby Up for Adoption: Tips and Procedures

There are moments in our lives as mothers that call upon our deepest reserves of strength, empathy, and love.

The decision to give a baby up for adoption is undoubtedly one of those moments.

It’s a choice often made from a place of selflessness, driven by a desire to provide the best possible life for a child.

While the path may seem daunting, it’s also a journey infused with hope and compassion. A decision that increases the chances for a brighter future.

There are various reasons a mother can give her baby up for adoption, including finances, physical or mental health issues, drug addiction, and incarceration.

Giving a Baby Up for Adoption
Image Source: iStockphoto/master1305

Whatever the reason is, finding the right adoptive family can help offer your child the best life possible. 

If you have an unplanned pregnancy or a child at home and are considering adoption, you may have questions like:

“How do I put my child up for adoption?” or “What are the steps involved in adopting a child?

This article will guide you, telling you precisely everything you need to know.

Adoption may be a way to enhance both your future and that of your kid.

So whether you are facing an unplanned pregnancy where parenting is not an option, or you have a child you want to give up for adoption, read carefully to learn the 8 steps, tips, and procedures on how to successfully give up a child for adoption.

How To Give A Baby Up For Adoption – 8 Steps

The expression “give a baby up” for adoption is frequent. You may have even used the phrase.

However, it contains a falsehood even though there is no malicious intent behind it. Adoption in no way involves “giving up.”

It’s a kind, brave, and proactive decision. However, using phrases like “place for adoption,” “choose adoption,” or “create an adoption plan” would be more uplifting.

Here are 8 steps to guide you through your adoption process.

An adoptive family discussing with a social worker.
Image Source: iStockphoto/AnnaStills

Step 1 – Visit The Doctor

If you think you might be pregnant, you should see a doctor or obstetrician-gynecologist to confirm. And if you’re pregnant, you can check to see how the pregnancy is going.

Whether you finally opt in for adoption, parenthood, or abortion, it would be best to start taking care of yourself.

The development and well-being of your unborn child depend greatly on the first few months of your pregnancy. You must start caring for yourself as soon as possible when your body experiences changes and new stresses.

Stop using alcohol or other drugs right now. You can get specific advice on how to take care of yourself and your unborn child during your pregnancy from your doctor.

Step 2 – Get In Touch With A Licensed Adoption Professional

When you decide to place a child for adoption, go for adoption agencies that are qualified and licensed. You can take a look at some of them to see which one best fits your interests.

They may offer you FREE support, resources, and direction.

With the aid of an adoption agency, you can locate a wonderful adoptive family, receive legal adoption financial support (following the regulations of your state), develop a hospital plan so you feel at ease throughout labor and delivery, and develop an open adoption strategy to keep in touch with your child.

Step 3 – Start The Adoption Plans

Your chosen professional will lay out all the alternatives to consider as you decide how you want the adoption process to proceed.

They can also point you toward government programs that will help you with healthcare costs and groceries, depending on your financial condition and social standing, and they can help you plan your labor and hospital stay.

Additionally, they can assist you in locating accommodation, food, supplies, maternity wear, and other necessities as your pregnancy progresses.

If known, your medical history and the father’s will be gathered. Your adoption professional should also offer therapy services directly or through an outside counselor.

Step 4 – Choose A Level Of Openness

The end of your bond with your child does not have to occur when you “give a baby away” for adoption. Open adoption is to thank for this.

You can have an open, semi-open, or closed connection with an adopted family, among other variations.

You have the option to decide the level of contact, if at all, that you wish to maintain with both the adoptive parents and the child.

Some ladies prefer to get letters and pictures once a year, but you can arrange for more frequent communication or in-person meetings.

So understand that it’s within your right to demand the communication level you want with your kid and the adoptive family, provided the extent of the demand is within the law.

Step 5 – Choose The Adoptive Parents

You get to choose the adoptive family you believe will be the best for your child when placing your baby up for adoption.

This option gives many would-be mothers a sense of control over the situation and the ability to impact their kids’ future significantly.

For you to understand more about adoptive families’ interests, occupations, parenting practices, and eagerness to become parents through adoption, the agency you select will provide you with information about them.

By looking at waiting families’ adoption profiles online, you can start your search for prospective adoptive parents at any moment.

When a woman views a family’s profile and learns they share similar interests or values, she most likely feels connected.

Once you’ve selected a family, you may pick whether to speak with them over the phone or in person.

You will be able to learn more about the family during this session and communicate your preferences for the remaining steps to them.

During this phase of the adoption process, you should feel free to express any queries, ideas, or worries.

Step 6 – Get To Meet The Adoptive Parents And Do Your Evaluations

Adoption has been more accessible in recent years, giving you more chances than ever to get to know the adoptive family before and after placement.  

Pre-placement communication is crucial to a successful adoption connection by all adoption specialists. It enables you to be sure that the folks you’ve selected will provide your child with the life of their dreams. 

You can communicate with the adoptive family by phone, conference call, video chat, email, text message, social media activity, and more.

Do you have some anxiety as well as excitement at the prospect of getting to know the adoptive family? That is typical.

This crucial phase of the adoption process will be carried out with the assistance of your adoption consultant.

Step 7 – Give Birth & Follow Through With The Legal Requirements

Your medical expenses and professional help are covered if you decide to place your baby up for adoption.

Your expert will work with you to develop a hospital plan as you get ready for labor and delivery.

Like your adoption plan, you have complete control over the hospital stay. When and how your kid is placed for adoption at the hospital is entirely up to you. 

You could choose, for instance, how much contact you want to have with the adoptive parents, how much time you want to spend with your child, who gets to hold your child first, and much more.

Depending on your state’s regulations, you must often wait at least 48 to 72 hours after your child’s birth before filing the adoption papers.

You will be assisted in getting ready for the legal procedure of how to place a child for adoption by your adoption specialist and an adoption lawyer.

Before starting the adoption document-signing process, they will ensure you are aware of your rights and comfortable with your choice.

8. Exchange Contacts

Your child’s placement for adoption is just the start. In place of “goodbye,” an adoption placement is “We’ll talk soon.”

When you sign the adoption paperwork, the process of placing a child for adoption is officially complete, but your adoption journey is not.

After the adoption, you can choose the relationship you wish to have with your child and the adoptive family.

You can choose how to “give up” your child for adoption, just as you can decide how your open adoption will appear after placement.

For at least 18 years, most women who choose adoption receive updates on their child. 

Many also communicate with the adopted family via calls, texts, emails, and social media posts. Some people even schedule one or more annual personal visits. 

As long as you select an adoptive family eager to pursue a relationship similar to how you imagine it, your dream of this relationship can come true.

Why Women Give Their Baby Up For Adoption

why mothers place their baby up for adoption
Image Source: Getty Images/damircudic

1. Give Them A  Better And Brighter Future

The decision to place a baby for adoption is made out of love and concern for your child.

Some mothers (or parents) know they can’t handle the cost of raising a child. And out of love and desire for the child to get the best possible life, they can decide to put the child up for adoption.

They believe an adopted family will give their child a loving and prosperous existence.

2. Abortion Doesn’t Sit Well With Them

The two options for dealing with an unwanted pregnancy are abortion and adoption if having children is impossible.

Either choice may be appropriate for your circumstances. Abortion’s harmful effects are frequently glossed over. It’s a complicated process, a difficult one, too.

Not that I’m saying that abortion is a negative thing. Instead, it’s not always as simple as it seems.

Abortion may seem morally or religiously unacceptable to some women. Whatever your motivations are, if abortion offends you, this may be an excellent reason to consider adoption.

3. It Allows Them To Achieve Their Dreams

Because it positively affects everyone’s lives, adoption is lovely. Dreams of adoptive parents are realized.


A loving, secure family is given to a child so they can develop and flourish. Birth parents pave the way for their children to have better futures. 


Putting your child up for adoption is a brave move. Not everyone can bear to give up their child to a different family.

It is a difficult task to deal with, a complex reality to live with, even if you remain in contact with the family and your child.

But to look at the bigger picture means you’re giving your child the finest life they could imagine. Therefore, it’s fair to feel scared and sad about leaving them.

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